Saturday, August 13, 2005

I Don't Do Drugs...I Am Drugs


The title of today's post is a quote by one of the most celebrated figures of surrealistic art, Salvador Dali (http://www.dali-gallery.com/). This sentiment could definitely provide a satisfactory explanation as to why the images in his paintings generally appear to be melting. However, that's not the direction I'm going with this. I ultimately want to talk about the favored drug of choice amongst the majority of Americans---caffeine. Truth be told, I drink an inordinate amount of the shit...so much so, that I seriously can't remember the last time I blinked. Anybody with half a brain knows that it's not good for you, but it wasn't until today that I was able to diagnose myself with caffeine-induced psychosis. That's right...this shit will screw you up worse than anything you can buy in a Ziploc from your local streetcorner pharmaceutical representative.

In 1995, NASA got a whole bunch of spiders high on a variety of different drugs, and then studied how the substances affected the types of webs they made. These are your tax-dollars at work here, so you at least deserve to be informed of the fascinating results. The spiders who were tweaked on caffeine made the worst webs of all, whereas the subjects who were intoxicated with marijuana, LSD, amphetamines, etc., were more highly functional by far. Pretty deep, huh? Starbucks and Mountain Dew are therefore the most likely reason why I'm stark raving mad. At Caffeineweb.com, you can learn more about this study, and also find out how to begin luring this monkey off your own back: http://www.caffeineweb.com/NASA%20Study.htm. Note to self: research short-term effects of snorting ground coffee beans recreationally.

With this information in mind, it's hard to tell what's going on in the photo above. Is Al Green high on caffeine, too, or is it Jesus lifting his spirit again? Either way, the quintessential soul man's classic song "Simply Beautiful" is happenin' over at Straight Bangin'---don't hesitate to grab it if it isn't already in your collection: http://www.straightbangin.blogspot.com/. They also have some other worthy selections posted right now, so you might want to pay a visit there either way.

I haven't personally enjoyed Aesop Rock a whole lot since Labor Days, but his new song "Facemelter" is pretty damned impressive. Get the mp3 at Razorblade Runner (in links section).

You can download Edan's track "Promised Land" from Fifteen Minutes To Listen. They also have a link to some free mp3s by Scott Matelic. While not exactly a household name, Matelic's music is worth checking out if you're a fan of DJ Shadow, DJ Krush, Controller 7 and/or RJD2: http://15minutestolisten.blogspot.com/.

Finally, I don't know much of shit about him, but I've been keeping Elohim Da God's song "This Is Home" in heavy rotation on my stereo the past couple of days. Click here to download that track for free, and stream a few of his other joints: http://music.download.com/elohimdagod/3600-8543_32-100752073.html?tag=listing_song_artist. Make sure you aren't the last to know, cuz this kid has some definite potential. You can tell he grew up bangin' Nas, Black Star, and several other artists that I'm way too caffeinated to think of right now.

2 comments:

B said...

Hey Scholar, nice post. I especially like the link to the webs. For more discussion on high spiders making crazy webs, check out the Psychedelics Encyclopedia by Peter Stafford, also containing a nice foreword by Andrew Weil.
I agree-maybe your readers are the strong silent type-but even though I don't leave many comments, I make sure to check in every day. Thanks Scholar,
B, (formerly Miss Maple)

Scholar said...

Dear B--thank you much for taking the time to leave some encouraging words. Having loyal readers like you is what truly inspires me to keep doing Souled On. Without you, I'd be nothing :) I'll definitely check out the Psychedelics Encyclopedia...I really appreciate the suggestion, cuz that just sounds like something that would interest me. Peace, and thanks again for reading...Scholar